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Sexual minorities, for example, tend to use online dating services at much higher rates than do straight people.
(Michael Rosenfeld—whose survey deliberately oversampled gays and lesbians in an effort to compensate for the dearth of research on their dating experiences—finds that “unpartnered gay men and unpartnered lesbians seem to have substantially more active dating lives than do heterosexuals,” a fact he attributes partly to their successful use of apps.
Maybe choice overload applies a little differently than Slater imagined.
Maybe the problem is not the people who date and date some more—they might even get married, if Rosenfeld is right—but those who are so daunted that they don’t make it off the couch.
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“Maybe next time I sign in,” she said, musing aloud, “I’ll just swipe right so I don’t have to do this awkward thing and get rejected.”Apart from helping people avoid the potential embarrassments (if also, maybe, the exhilaration) of old-fashioned flirting, apps are quite useful to those who are in what economists call “thin markets”—markets with a relatively low number of participants.Online daters, he argued, might be tempted to keep going back for experiences with new people; commitment and marriage might suffer.Michael Rosenfeld, a sociologist who runs a longitudinal study out of Stanford called “How Couples Meet and Stay Together,” questions this hypothesis; his research finds that couples who meet online tend to marry more quickly than other couples, a fact that hardly suggests indecision.She then proceeded to tell me about a guy she knew slightly from college, whom she’d recently bumped into a few times.She found him attractive and wanted to register her interest, but wasn’t sure how to do that outside the context of a college party.The phrase If something exists, there is porn of it used to be a clever internet meme; now it’s a truism.BDSM plays at the local multiplex—but why bother going?For one thing, lots of people appear to be using them as a diversion, with limited expectations of meeting up in person.As Iris, who’s 33, told me bitterly, “They’ve gamified interaction.I’m happy to be good at it, but what am I really achieving?” said an app user who described herself as abstinent by choice.